10 cardinal sins of fashion

There’s an exception to every rule. If you have a mental illness, were late for work, or just don’t give a shit–you can exclude yourself.

1. Socks with sandals. One of the things I’m trying to get my mother to stop doing. Believe it or not, I did this as a child with Tevas, but Birkenstocks would be even worse. Just don’t do it. If you must wear socks, wear sneakers, please! Sock-tans aren’t cute!

2. Visible undergarments of any kind. There are too many options available to have your stuff showing through in any major way. White shirt equals a nude bra, not a white one. And don’t get me wrong, a little peek-a-boo action can be sexy, but I mean little. A bra strap, a sliver of thong (both which should match the rest of your outfit). However, no one should be seeing the cups of your bra, or a “whale tail;” if they do, you look like a skank. VPL (Visible Panty Line) is also in this category, especially when bulging is involved. It’s just not attractive.

3. Crocs. Those awful, foam-rubber, brightly colored, ventilated clogs that everyone is wearing. Including small children. I might love you, but I don’t love your Crocs. Maybe for garden shoes, but I see people in these everywhere. They appall me. Just wear flip-flops! They are so ugly!

4. Fake designer bags. Call them knockoffs, call them imitations, replicas–they’re just fake. And more than likely, you look like a cheap ass poser. (Sorry.) If you can’t afford a real Coach bag, why are you carrying a fake one? It totally defeats the purpose. Not being a big label/logo whore myself, I’m more apt to carry a bag that’s just cute and matches my outfit. Remember the Louis Vuitton Murakami craze 3 years ago? They’re so passe now but every so often you’ll see some poor woman still carrying hers. Either she spent her savings on it or she just hasn’t a clue. Logo bags aren’t that original and fake logo bags are even worse.

5. Horrifying, inexcusable clashing. At least try not to do black and dark brown, or black and navy. Those inexcusable skinny-striped bags that go with nothing. Multiple florals, stripes, dots–you get it. Your mother should have taught you. Don’t be lazy, switch your purse. Find shoes that match. It’s not that difficult.

6. Pajamas in public. I’m not talking cute, Victoria’s Secret PINK sweats. I’m talking Tweety Bird PJs from Wal-Mart eight years ago and you’re out buying shit. Please put some sweats on, at least. Preferably nice-looking ones, but come on. I don’t care how lazy you are, when did people decide it was okay to just walk around looking dumpy like they just got out of bed? If you’re that cathartic, you probably shouldn’t be leaving the house anyway.

7. Holiday sweaters. Enough said.

8. Clothes that don’t fit or flatter. Find your size. There is nothing worse than ill-fitting clothing. When in doubt, cover yourself. It doesn’t mean wear a tent, either. Invest in some good shapewear and wear clothes in your size, and it will do a body a world of good. And of course, black is always slimming.

9. Mom jeans: High-waisted, pleated, tapered leg and baggy thighs, maybe even an elasticized waist…there has never been, nor will there ever be, anything chic or cute about these fashion horrors.

10. Popped collars. Just the thought of someone trying so hard to be “preppy” disturbs me. Who cares? Polo shirts are well and good (preferably Lacoste, Abercrombie & Fitch, or Ralph Lauren) but popping the collar is unnecessary and looks flat-out ridiculous, no matter who you are. The person I was completely in love with once came to my house with his collar popped, and I wanted to shut the door in his face. I have a serious problem with this. It was never cool, and if you’re still doing it, you’re even less cool.

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9 thoughts on “10 cardinal sins of fashion

  1. Let’s see. You’re right, socks in sandals are the worst! Especially white socks. Older men tend to do that a lot, it’s creepy, haha. Crocs are ewww indeed!

    God I hated the Louis Vitton trend. Such ugly bags. We went to Turkye 3 or 4 years ago, and all these women were buying fake designer bags there, especially Louis Vuitton. And it’s so easy to tell it’s fake when you know what to look for.

    The clashing thing is something I do. I can’t be bothered to switch shoes or purses all the time. Therefore I often go for black purses that suit nearly anything, lol. Same for shoes, though I have quite some shoes. I’m just lazy like that at times.

    Roflol, who wears pajamas in public? Ew.

    People who wear ill-fitting clothes just look disgusting. Especially those who wear clothes that are 2 sizes too small, so you can see major ‘lovehandles’ :/

    Ew, the ‘mom jeans’ are very unflattering indeed.

    Roflol, the popped collar makes me think of Da Fonzzzzzz or the Thunderbirds 😉

    Great post!

  2. omg! I hate crocs! When I was at the belgian coast a couple of weeks ago , everyone was walking around in them ! I so wanted to yell: ” take them off, you are NOT a fucking farmer!”

    but I didn’t and just laughed in silence

  3. I agree with crocs being fucking hideous. I don’t care how comfortable they are.

    I agree with everything stated, nice post Vicki!

  4. Sadly, I own a pair of hot pink crocs..lol. I mostly wear them in the back yard when I’m just playing around with my son, but I did wear them out in public today. I know they’re ugly, but I love them.

  5. “holiday sweaters- enough said.”

    hahaha. ;] everything you stated was true. but i’m a slave to replica bags. shoot me?

  6. ahahaha, crocs are SO FUGGGLYY!!
    I can’t believe it turned into a trend in my school.
    The girls in my school think “pj’s” are cute and wear them to school. yea, some of them are but NOT in public!
    to me they look like they just woke up and just went strait to class, and believe me you DO NOT want to see what I look like in the morning with my pj’s!!
    thanx for the post Vicki!

  7. flip flops are the ugliest and most annoying foot-related invention EVER!!!
    they should be banned. girls wear those damn things everywhere nowadays and even with dresses (nice ones too) and they look like lazy slobs!

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